This is a lovely article. Thanks Melody!
Yes, confidence is difficult to understand, especially when we pick out confident behaviour and fixate on it, wondering why we don’t have it, wondering what we are doing wrong.
I can definitely relate to having the wrong perspective on confidence, and I still struggle with it at times. I sometimes wish I was at a place in my life that I’m not, and that’s a difficult thought to deal with.
It’s a great reminder that trial and error and effort are keys to becoming confident at a particular task. And it’s also great to remember that we shouldn’t necessarily have confidence in any given situation, because sometimes we haven’t earned the “right” to be confident yet – we simply haven’t developed the skills or knowledge required to be confident at that time.
But that also requires humility, courage, and understanding of the process… none of which are easily acquired. We easily feel not good enough, and it can be difficult to reframe our situations to ones where we incorporate the wisdom you talk about.
So, once again, thanks for the reminder!!