Forcing yourself to be grateful when you don’t feel it will only lead to frustration and guilt. Allow gratitude to surface on its own: Say “thank you” when you’re actually thankful, and say “this sucks” when something sucks. In doing so, you’re sending yourself a message that your feelings, good or bad, are valid — which i…
Hi Ashley, thanks for the article! I think you've noticed something interesting about gratitude, which is that how we use it matters.
If we use it as a tool to deny or ignore that certain thoughts and feelings exist, I agree that we are doing ourselves a disservice.
However, there is also evidence that we can cultivate gratitude. Why would we want to do this? Because it seems that humans have a negativity bias, meaning that we tend to see the world from the glass half empty perspective. Practicing gratefulness, like by using a gratitude journal, can help to pull our minds toward a more accurate perspective of our lives. But, the purpose isn't to sugar-coat our problems, it's to simply prevent our minds from spiralling toward the negative unnecessarily, which seems to be their natural inclination.